Have You Ever Been in Love?
by broadwaycsi
Summary: Stella Bonasera, a strict, discipline leader of the NYPD crime lab, had the word "single for life" written in her stars. Never had she planned on falling in love. That is until she met a man named Mac Taylor.
1. Prologue

**Love. **A word I never really grapsed the true meaning of. Of course, I knew the true definition

Love

–noun

a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person

But I've never felt before. My friends would mention exhuberant things about it, like Love is magical, Love is the best feeling a woman could ever feel in her life, every woman should be loved. But somehow, it didn't fit me. Love was not written in my fate; it wasn't meant for me, Stella Bonasera, that tough, uptight detective everyone knew me as. I never thought I'd fall in love, and then, I met Mac Taylor.

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A/N: I know it's short, but I've been having this idea as a fanfic for quite some time and I didn't want to forget amidst all this stress about finals. :( Do tell what you think about it and as always, comments are welcome! :)


	2. What is Love?

A/N: Hey everyone! OK, I didn't mean for it to take so long to upload this. It's just that with last week being finals and my internet totally crashed, I had no way of getting on the internet...so I apologize for the confusing prologue and hopefully this story will make a little more sense. :)

Enjoy!

* * *

It was the annual Bonasera family reunion. My nieces and nephews played in the fields while my sisters were talking in the background. I dozed off for a few minutes just gazing at how playful the kids were, how carefree and innocent their lives were at the time.

Is my son or daughter there playing with their cousins? Oh gosh, no. I'm not even married for heaven sake! Is it hard being single, well...or some it's agonizing to look at. Take, for example my mother. My always loving mother who just wanted her daughters to be happily married with a satisfying life. I, however, contradicted those expectations. It's not that I'm a cold person or anything, it's just that I knew, the moment I matured into adulthood, that I, Stella Bonasera, was not cut out to be a loving wife. Or a girlfriend. I just wasn't. My mother, of course, was very unhappy with that. My three younger sisters went off to college, fell in love, had kids just like what she had wanted. But I was different. I didn't mind it, either, being single. It does just as good a job as being married. I'm just taking on life alone. Don't take me wrong or anything, I love children and I love all my nieces and nephews. I just leave that territory to my sisters.

"Stella, Stella...STELLA!" I heard.

"Oh, Miranda," I said while pulling my hair back playfully, "Hi! I was just um..."I managed to stutter.

"Day-dreaming again?" my other sister Alicia said.

"No, I was just..."

"Oh, whatever, Stel, just tell us, what's going on in your life?" My youngest sister Elena asks.

"Ye, do tell what's going on. I mean, you're all the way in the city, you never contact us, you just come once a year to these reunions! What's happening?" Miranda eagerly asked.

I know they were badgering the question about a new man in my life, but after ten years of asking, they've found their own sneaky ways of surreptitiously asking me.

"Well, the usual...you know. Work, fighting crime. I actually just got promoted to First Grade CSI of the NYPD crime lab!" I said with a proud smile, obviously knowing that that's not what they were expecting to hear from me.

"Really? That's great, Stel!" Alicia said.

"Who's your partner gonna be?" Elena casually asked while chewing her pasta.

Here we go again...

"I actually don't know yet," I replied, "but he or she is moving in from Chicago later this week. Don't worry, I'll be sure to tell you guys all about it." I finished with a smile.

You should have seen the smiles on their faces perk up.

You see, for the past eight years in my career, not only have I been single, I've been paired up with Lindsay Monroe as my "partner in crime." Honestly, we got really close, after working all those excruciatingly long days of crime work. But my sisters, being the lovable nosy gals that they are, had their own thoughts about our work "relationship." For years, they thought I was leaning "that way" with Lindsay. Obviously, there was nothing between us since during that entire time, Lindsay was happily married to Danny Messer, another one of our CSI's. Needless to say, it was quite an awkward period of misunderstanding.

My mother called in my nieces and nephews from their playtime in order for them to start eating. My sister's husband came to join us soon after, disrupting any further conversations about my forlorn love life.

I wasn't able to see each and every one of my nieces and nephews before the started playing, being such busy-bees that they are, so they all approached me and gave me a sweet kiss on the cheek before attacking the buffet sure were the fun crowd of the party, ignoring all warnings from their parents while pushing and shoving each other out of their way just to lay their smalls hands on any piece of food they desired.

"Hi Aunt Stella!" I heard a voice say. I turned and saw my oldest niece Amy sit right next to me, her plate full of food.

"Hey Amy! What's going on?" I asked.

"Nothing much, you? Aren't you going to get something to eat?" she asked while motioning to the buffet table.

"I will," I replied, "after the mob settles down," I finished and winked.

"So, how's high school?" I asked.

"Fine, no cute boys at all, though. "she said with a disappointed smirk.

That's what I loved about my niece Amy: I could talk to her about things she'd never even DARE to mention to her mother, Alicia. In turn, I could tell her anything I'd rather not dare say to my sisters.

"How about you, Aunt Stella? Any handsome fishies in your ocean?" she asked, with curiosity sparkling from her eyes.

I sighed. Even with my nieces, the question never fails to appear.

"Nope, and not interested," I said firmly with my lips pursed. "Really, I'm fine with the way things are right now, I got a job promotion, great apartment, stable life, what more could I ask for?" I said.

"A man," she sarcastically whispered.

I nudged her side and she started to laugh. I laughed at the way she was trying so hard to keep her food inside her mouth.

"Wow, well....seriously, Aunt Stella, think about it. Have you ever been in love before?" she asked me.

"What?"I replied back.

"Have you ever...like...fallen in love with someone before? A high school sweetheart? That one crush you can never keep out of your mind?" she asked.

That was a good question. Have I gotten to the point where I couldn't feel love anymore? Would I ever be able to experience that sensation called "love?" Or is it too late?


	3. Meeting Mac Taylor

A whole week had passed since the reunion and I still couldn't keep those thoughts out of my head. I began to brain-storm reasons as to why I was still single for my age. Was there still hope? For the first time in my life, I had actually contemplated on getting a guy in my life, changing the "single" in my relationship status into "taken", at least. Was my niece that influencial?

Anyways, it was also the first week that I had started my job as the head of the crime lab. My partner hadn't arrived yet, so I was alone for this job pretty much. It wasn't too much that I couldn't handle, I mean, I still had a pretty good time with my co-workers who were now my "employees" in a way. I still ran through evidence, interrogated suspects, filed papers, even as a boss.

But after that week, boy did those things change... after that week, was when I met Mac Taylor.

I remember the first time I saw him: I had just finished talking to Hawkes about some DNA samples to be analyzed when I turned and saw this man, whom I've never seen before in the lab. I felt kinda of stupid, you know just standing there and watching him, talking to Sinclair. As I was about to snap out of it, Sinclair called my name and motioned for me to come over.

"Det. Bonasera, I'd like you to meet Mac Taylor, our new addition to the NYPD, as well as your new partner, directly from Chicago."

"Pleasure to meet you," he said, while holding his hand out for me to shake.

I stood there, silent, for just a few seconds before it dawned on me that I should shake his hand. Right now.

"Uh...Hi! Pleasure to meet you, too." I said, dumbfoundedly, while shaking his hand back.

"I'll be looking forward to seeing some good teamwork from you two." Sinclair firmly said.

"You've got nothing to worry, sir." Mac said with a smooth voice.

"Yes, sir, nothing to worry." I said.

Things have changed, my friend, for me, Stella Bonasera.


	4. Awkard Encounters

Wow...so I'm sorry for the long wait for another update. I had choir rehearsals all of last week and this week's been really hectic, so I couldn't really write out anything...:( But, I promise to get back into the writing groove and hopefully update my other stories. For now, it's only this one...

Enjoy!

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A few hours had passed since I had met my new partner Mac Taylor but it felt like + was avoiding him more than collaborating with him to get something accomplished. Throughout the day, I'd often find myself just staring at him, from far away distances and short, close-up shots, too. I just felt outright awkward around him, I mean, I just barely met the guy and all, but I felt that I had to put in some initiative; get to know him , on the other hand, was perfect. Right on the dot with everything. He asked the right questions, came to reasonable conclusions, worked well with his employees and there I am, trying to actually DO my job instead of staring at him all day. I felt like a high school low-life spying on the quarterback of the varsity football team. God, why'd he have to be so perfect?

I finally came to terms with my awkwardness today at the lab. It was weird, I'm never awkward. People know me as focused, independent, often stubborn at times, but never awkward. Distracted was another action added to my daily tasks as well. I knew when to draw the line. I don't know what happened along the way, but it was just a weird feeling. One time, I was looking into the microscope, comparing a plant sample to the one obtained at the scene when I looked up and saw Mac. He and Hawkes were discussing, quite casually, I must say. He had that quality, that soft, husky, romantic voice that any girl's heart would melt for.

Although he was smoking hot, I couldn't help but feel slightly disturbed at the way I thought about him.

_Stella, stop thinking like this! He's your partner for heaven sake! _I thought.

"What are you thinking about, Stel?" I heard.

It was Lindsay, I had forgotten she was in the lab with me. Oops.

"Oh..um...nothing! I was just zoning out...and.." I tried to explain.

"Oh, please. You never zone out," she argued. She turned towards the direction I was looking at and said,

"Who are we checking out, this time?"

"No one..." I said softly, trying to focus on my work.

"Oh, that cute lab tech over there? Sorry Stel, he's married." Lindsay said.

"Linds, I wasn't looking at anyone, OK?" I said trying to get her to stop talking.

I love Lindsay. But sometimes, she becomes the typical, trying-to-find-someone-to-hook-up-with-you girlfriend, if you know what I'm saying.

Oh, it's that kid! Oh...ew...he's too young..."she said while squinting her eyes.

I let her ramble on...eventually she'll stop.

"Oh, no..." she said, while coming to an abrupt stop.

"What?"

"Please don't tell me you're oogling over Hawkes, I mean it's just..." she started to say.

"Oh god, no! Of course not! I can never do that in the workplace! It's unprofessional!" I whispered loudly, trying to distract her from talking. I hope she wouldn't get to Mac.

"Oh, OK, so who are we looking at then...hmm...oh I know! The guy we got that transferred from Jersey to work in ballistics!" Lindsay said, with a huge smile of delight slapped on her face.

"Sure! He's pretty cute... " I said, with biting sarcasm.

Ha! She fell for it!

"OK, then...whatever you say goes." Lindsay said. "Why don't you take him out for a coffee?" Lindsay suggested.

"Evidence, Lindsay...must be analyzed...right now..." I said in a sing-song voice.

"Whatever, Stel, just promise me, you'll ask?"

I looked her straight in the eye and said, "I'll ask Mr. Ballistics dude from Jersey, I promise."

I felt bad about lying, but someday, I'll tell Lindsay the truth.

I remembered that I needed something from my locker, so I went down to the lockerroom to get it. It's quite a busy place, with people walking in and out, dumping their stuff, beeping in their combinations, tired workers just taking a breather and such. Eventually I got used to it and didn't mind whoever was behind me or entering.

I checked my purse and took out my wallet. It also got a little hot so I folded my sweater and stuck it inside neatly.

I wish I had paid attention sooner.

Well, I didn't hear footsteps, so I assumed I was alone.

Boy was I wrong.

As soon as I closed my locker, I turned right and bumped into Mac. Bumped, as in, total body contact. .'.

"Oh my gosh, I am so sorry!" was all that could come out,

"It's OK," he said with that perfect smile.

You see, my natural reflex when I bump into someone is that I often place my hands on their chest. As of I'm stopping furthur, "contact" if I must say. It usually sends off as a joke and it's quick, but in this situation, well, I kind of kept my hands there for too long.

"Are you OK?" I asked while giggling subtlely.

He kept reassuring that he was fine, I kept apologizing, sooner or later at least a minute had past.

My hands still on his chest.

I realized it quite too late.

"Oh, god, I'm sorry..." I said abruptively, immediately taking my hands off his shirt while tucking my hair behind my ears.

_Way to keep it awkward, Stella..._ I scoled myself in my head.

And he just stood there, perfect and handsome as always, just smiling and giggling.

"Anyways," he said while clearing his throat, "I was thinking, since we are going to be partners, why don't we get to know each other a little better, you know go out for a cup of coffee or something?"

"I was thinking the same thing as well, sure! I'd love, too!" I said with a smile on my face, "I'm going on my break in 15, I just gotta clean up something at the lab, so I can meet you in your office and we'll go together?"

"Sounds Perfect." he said.

I smiled. "OK," I replied.

I started to walk out when he tapped my shoulder.

I turned;

"Stella?" he said

"Yeah?" I replied, my head turned while my body faced forward,

"Exit's that way," he said.

"Right." I said with defeat. And humiliation. Boy, was that embaressing, I smiled at him as I turned and walked out the door.

Awkward encounter? I must say?


	5. Gathering Up The Courage

A/N: Hey guys! Wow, I didn't realize how long it has been since the last update. I haven't had any new ideas. Sorry for this short chapter, BUT I promise to add a little more to the following chapters. :)

* * *

I kept that suggestion from Lindsay in mind; trying to ask someone out for coffee. I know, she suggested the guy from Jersey but I knew better. Why would I ask a guy that I probably won't even talk to in the first place? I guess this was a valid excuse to ask Det. Taylor out for a cup of coffee. I mean, he _already _had the idea in mind...

-

"So you were a Marine before switching to the world of crime-fighting?" I asked Mac.

He nodded.

"Sweet..." I managed to reply back.

It had only been about fifteen minutes since we left the crime lab to get a cup of coffee, but I already knew a plethora of new facts about my partner. I was just fascinated by the life he was living, back in Chicago, his life as a Marine and the new life he had to adjust to here in the city.

"It was a great honor, being a Marine, " he said humbly, "It's not much different from the world of police work, you know. I mean, it's just like the sheer aura of being able to defend your country except without the country. Just the city, New York, in this case." he said.

"Which is a handful already, trust me," I said.

We both smiled and laughed.

When the time came for us to order our drinks, I said my usual.

"I'll have a small cafe latte, please."

"Small black coffee for me," he said.

"That'll be all for you guys?" the cashier asked.

"Yes," we both answered at the same time.

"Alright, your total comes out to be $4.79"

I reached into my wallet and swiftly pulled out a five-dollar bill.

"Stella..." Mac started to say while trying to reach into his pocket. I grabbed his hand,

"Please, it's our first coffee break as partners, it's on me," I insisted while motioning him to forget about his wallet.

He smiled. "Thank you."

Note to heart: please stop melting.

We talked. For a long time. I don't think I have ever learned so much from one person than from those forty-five minutes I spent with my partner. His experience with the Marines, his entire life, his...dedication to this field of work. It made me feel bad about the little that I did in my spare time. I felt like I really had that connection with him, you know?

-

Back at the lab, I was greeted with the load of work that had piled during my break. I was rushing back and forth in the hallways, examining evidence, talking to other lab technicians. It wasn't until the end of my shift at around 9:00 pm, that I saw something that caught my eye.

There I saw my partner just standing there in the hallway. It was rare, I would never picture him just standing around, I mean, usually he always keeps himself busy. But it was almost the end of his shift as well, so I thought why not? Just approach him Stella.

As I took a few footsteps towards him, a woman appeared from the corridor behind him. He turned around, I don't know if he saw me, but upon seeing the woman, he smiled. That same smile he had when he was with me during our break. I quickly stepped behind a wall and peered so I just had a little glance on the two of them. As she was putting her coat on, the exchanged a few words, and smiled occasionally. There was something different with the way he looked at her. It was with affection. Honestly, I was hoping it wasn't the way I thought it would be. Then they kissed.


End file.
